Cooking, Baking, Drinking

 

You will not believe this but I have been in the right mind set for the past two days! Two whole days! Especially today, I ate all the right things all the right times. Yesterday I started the day by baking! My first real baking (I made a few cookies before) and here is what I did. You should all try it. So yummy! And still in the line to be a snack! I couldn't get myself to use sugar, so substituted with Splenda. That made the scones low fat and low sugar! Fabulous! I couldn't believe the texture was right and I didn't mess it up. The baked scones looked exactly like the photo on Skinny Taste. Hah that's my thing. I get confidence from the photos. If what I did looks like the real deal then I am proud :)

Today I cooked Minestrone! Again from SinnyTaste.com. I had to substitute lentils instead of beans. Cos we don't use canned beans and I would have to let the beans rest in water overnight (or simply six hours but hell that's overnight to me) and I really wanted to cook something healthy for dinner. It is fat-free. Well OK low-fat in reality cos there is fat in the pasta but other than that no no no no fat! And it tastes great! One big bowl fills you up and leaves you satisfied! Satisfaction is a big deal for me!

The minestrone is packed with veggies. I also had celery for lunch. Had an apple, a pear and a banana with yogurt for snacks. Well my body isn't used to so much fruit and veggies!! Haha I'm so sleepy yet I have extra energy and I feel lighter than I normally do at night. Hah! That's a good diet for ya!

Mum is totally on board. We prepared (OK I did) an apple tea in the morning with lots of herbs and lemons and cinnamon and honey. Been drinking that all day in between meals. Helped a lot with my appetite. I'm already drinking something so I'm too busy to wanna eat a chocolate cake?! That kinda deal is going on. Tomorrow I'll be eating out at least one meal. But I'm gonna take a bottle of tea with me. Also an apple may be. 

I'm resting my knee today although I did go shopping out, not around the corner but picked a further market. In the middle of a rain shower. That was fun. My right knee is scaring me. I'm giving up on trying to get along with an other doctor who my insurance pays for. Cos the last idiot I went to see didn't find any problems, gave me pills that gave me violent vertigo! I'm NOT going back. I'm gonna try to see my old doc this week if my father can take me. Cos I can't afford to pay if he asks for any tests or whatever without daddy's credit card. Yeah that's the honest truth right there.

My weekend begins tomorrow!! WooHoo Have a great one xx

Oh Food Glows Too

 It's 1.30 am and I don't wanna go to sleep cos I feel so hungry! It's been like this for a couple of weeks. I get hunger "attacks" at night. I know I should have been asleep already! But guess what I did? I decided to READ about food. Where to go? Oh She Glows... Oh she glows alright. She is glowing my tummy right now. I guess I wanted to just get an idea for what I can cook for tomorrow. Of course I knew I would feel even more hungry and restless. I simply love food too much at the moment. I'm also so very sleepy.

Yeah whatever.. I found this beautiful lentil and bean casserole dish (here) and it is so easy to make, it's perfect! I love lentils. I can smell the dish already. Divine!

I loved this weekend! We did nothing special. But I just loved it! Strange how sometimes we just don't really feel much for our partners or people around us and the next day we are so in love the world seems to be dipped in yellow (my happy color). This week is one of those. I'm in love ♥ I can't get enough of my boyfriend. And this is the right week for it cos friday is a national holiday!! Right on time! If the weather is as good as it was this week we will have a wonderful 3-day weekend. I don't wanna jinx it. But I've been wanting to go to the islands (Istanbul have lovely islands with no traffic, only nature, beautiful people, nice houses, cute restaurants and some tourist shopping) I really hope we can go on saturday may be. Eat some good food and enjoy the fresh air. I want it as much as I want to eat right now.

I almost forgot the scale. I weighed in @ 204.5lbs today. Again. I'll be 202 lbs or less next week. Because I said so.

Mondays such even when you don't have a job cos that's the day I feel that I don't have a job the most.

I'm off to bed. Finally. Goodnight lovers.

THIS IS AN OFFICIAL COMEBACK!

It's been a month since I posted!! That is such a long time. But first I wanna say thank you for all your support ♥ It is unbelievable how important it can be the support of people I haven't even met face to face :) You guys rock! Especially Patrick! Here is what he told me:
An elephant was drinking out of a river one day, when he spotted a turtle asleep on a log. So, he ambled on over and kicked it clear across the river.
"What did you do that for?" Asked a passing giraffe.
"Because I recognized it as the same turtle that took a nip out of my trunk 53 years ago."
"Wow, what a memory" commented the giraffe.
"Yes," said the elephant, "turtle recall".

Patrick, I have no words LOL I am that elephant though. Not in the size but the mind. I have no practical memory but I don't forget stupid stuff like that. I always wait for the moment I will have my kick! Painful it sounds. So I'm working on moving on. I have some success with this actually. Some anger, frustration, ugliness I had been dragging on for over 12 years... I recently finally let go. But that's not the subject here really :) Not today. I just wanted to say I'm trying and I'll get there some day. See the turtle and not kick, cos that kick hurts me more. Yeah for growing up a little.

Should I give you an update? My grandma got worse before it got, just a little, better. (Just to remind you, she thought she was pregnant from my father and wanted to kill the baby) Her doctors' have been great. One of them had the exact same problem with her mother!! So doctor told us all about how these things go and everything she said was right on. Like grandma was always obsessed about her stuff, constantly counting her underwear, shoes, batteries... and claim something was stolen everyday. Doctor says usually the sexual freak-outs come next. Her mother actually thought she got raped by her own son! I can't imagine how scary that must have been. Thankfully my grandma didn't have that kinda thinking. She just thought she was pregnant. Now she KNOWS she isn't!!!! YAY a little success. She is somehow uncomfortable with dad though. And he is now all nervous to come home. Although this whole thing seems like fading away slowly. May be next month things could go back to normal.

Oh my cousin! She had the operation and the cancer has been officially removed and there is no spread! The rest of her tests came back clean. On top of that she won't need a very difficult treatment. She will be good as new in a few months.

My funny little dog has been sick. She is old and it is time to except that. I had been missing a lot of sleep getting up in the middle of the night to fight her trying to make her swallow the medicine. She also quit eating for about a week! Our sweet vet told me it was normal. It took dogs time to recover and have their appetite back. Then she asked me wouldn't I feel the same way. I couldn't stop laughing! I finish my last bite and start imagining the next meal! How can I ever understand such a concept! :) My doggy is doing much better and she is eating just like her mama :D At least she wants to.

I have been eating a little dangerously this week. I am not sure but I might be on my period. Yes I don't know when I have a period. Cos I don't have physical evidence most of the time. My IUD pretend stopped my periods. I just don't always "see" anything. So sometimes I just am not sure if I'm right at that time. Because I had this thing for 4 years (ouch it has to come out next year and a new one comes and ouch ouch OUCH) let's be frank who can keep track of something they can't see for 4 years. Why the hell am I writing all this?? Oh right! I had an appetite overload this week. Now I'm trying to get back on track. Just started today so these first two days are not easy for me. Gotta make sure I'm not gonna chicken out, running away from the scale next monday!

I have been cooking a little. For me and the family. One thing I wanna tell you, I poached an egg today!!! Not 100% perfect but almost! :) Watching others do it on tv or internet I seriously doubted I could do it. By the way I'm not sure if no one makes it around here but my parents have no concept of poached eggs. I'm sure I had them in elementary school or at someone else's home, but yeah apparently it's not a popular concept and I personally have no idea why.

Now I gotta go get ready. I'm taking mum to see Avatar. Gonna be her first 3D! It was time she saw the movie too. I love re-releases! Have a great week ♥


P.S. I also got a blog award from Amanda. Check out her blog here. I'll post about the award tomorrow. Thanks! xo

Beautiful Day

Hello Hello! Last night, finally, we saw U2! Man I think I've been waiting for this concert all my life. Been a fan for 14 years now. Before that I was a fan I just didn't know about it :) Purchased the tickets last year! Can you imagine the waiting for the actual event! It was all worth it. It was heaven. I want more. I really want more.

Boyfriend, last minute, found some extra tickets and mom, who always thinks everything is too expensive and yes we do have a financial hell right now but yeah, got to come with us! Which was perfect. She doesn't listen to much music but she enjoys big shows. Last year she came to Björk's concert with my and J and she probably had even more fun than us if it is possible. Daddy wouldn't come. He just lives in a different world than us, just the same house. Nevermind. He simply doesn't share anything with me or mom. And I guess I'm old enough to except him as he is. Whatever... I was thrilled mom could come. Boyfriend enjoyed it more than Bono himself and I still want more :)

I have a little complaining to do though. If I didn't I wouldn't be me, right? The stupid Olympic Stadium the concert was at is ridiculous! Since they built that place whoever had to go to that place been miserable. Getting out of the parking hell took us over 2 hours!!! We were home past 3 am! How do you not fix such a mess in the past, I'm not sure but possibly 5 years. Stupid stupid stupid! OK I'll admit I didn't mind it that much but my poor boyfriend had to get up at 5.30 am to get to work! Isn't it strange how we get defensive when a loved one has to just lose some sleep? I can yell at him all day then he can't get enough sleep and I wanna take revenge and cuddle my baby for a whole week :)

In the end it was a wonderful night and I wouldn't mind living it over and over again.

On my last post I answered 8 questions for Patrick has tagged me. I tagged 8 people in the end and one of them was Luke! This too-smart-for-his-own-good Luke tagged me back!! :) He is a smart one alright! So here I'm answering his questions this time.

1. What is your favorite song quote?

Gonna be lame may be but all I can think of is "You can't always get what you want, but if you try sometime you just might find, you get what you need." by the Rolling Stones

2. What is your favorite exercise or workout?
Most of what I can do is walk. But I love workout videos/DVDs. Anything Jillian Michaels is good to me.


3. Favorite place to go on vacation and activity to do?
Italy! Anywhere in Italy will do :) I like feeling free and just taking walks, sitting at a cafe, drinking my espresso, reading a book or just have a conversation. Simple.

4. Do you collect anything, if so what and how did it start?
Other than fat I guess I collect movies. I don't have a number for you but I probably have over 200 DVDs at the moment. Then there are other formats. How I started? My dad lend me his credit card :)

5. Hardest obstacle you have had to overcome in your weight loss/fitness/training goals?
My body is like an obstacle course. I got two injured knees, arrhythmia, inner ear balance problems, chronic insomnia and gastritis. I don't think I left anything out. Other than that I have no will power. I see it I eat it. And that is my biggest problem still.

6. What do you do now and if you could choose any career what would it be?
I'm still looking for a job! This question is mean :) Just kidding. One day I would like to own a cafe/book store. Run the place, make people feel good and write my own stuff along the way.

7. If you could choose and exotic animal to have as a pet what would it be?
A Puma.

8. Do you use a reward system for your goals, (formally set or not) and if so what is your favorite reward?
I do. I already have a dress (I can't fit in it yet) my boyfriend bought for me from one of my favorite shops modcloth.com. When I get under 200lbs I'm getting a water bottle! I think.


Today is the last day of Ramadan!!! Also meaning we have a 4 day-weekend!!!!!!!! Well today was a half day for people who actually have jobs. Boyfriend asked to come over to watch a movie or something. I told him to just go to bed :) He needs his sleep more than I need to see him. I need to help my mom with some cooking and cleaning for the Ramadan Holiday. A lot of visitors and visits for the religious holidays. I help today then I'm free for the next four days. Cos I'm not into crowds that much. Neither is mom but dad want it so he gets it. Grandma is suppose to come back soon. I miss her more than I thought I would. I still doubt I'll feel the same when she arrives. Go figure.

Happy Wednesday!

You've Been Tagged

Hello! I've had an interestingly busy week with family affairs. Guests from out of town (my father's aunt, her daughter and her family), another cousin of mine is having a job scare, last night she cried for hours "my daughter is just 4, how am I gonna take care of her with only my husband's income..." My father did a little asking around today and the situation may not be as bad as my cousin thought at first. And stuff like that. I was talking to mom last night and we both think bad or not so ideal things come in bulk. We will just need to get through our own hell with the finance, lack-of-jobs, and all the rest and there will be light at the end of the tunnel!

About the weekly planning... I did good last week and lost another pound :) But this week started bad. With the guests and oh very horrible eating especially on monday and tuesday. Now I'm working very hard to take it back. For example, yesterday I did The Biggest Loser Last Chance Workout and walked on the treadmill for 40 minutes! That added up to 925 calories burned in one day! I am sore obviously so only walking for today. Tomorrow I wanna have a similar workout session as yesterday. I had to rest for four days around the weekend because of my knees. But hopefully I won't have to for a while and promised myself to walk at least 45 minutes every single day. I really really really want to see a loss next monday too. Well I wanna see a loss every monday till I'm on target!

(UPDATE: Before I finished this post my mom called me and told me she wasn't gonna workout today so I could get on the treadmill right away. So I did. Walked 5.3miles (8.6km) in 90 minutes, burned 920 calories!! WOoHOo)

Oh hey I changed my blogger template! What do you think? I loved the old one but it was even more childish looking or so I thought. I love the new hot chick :) I'll call her River (as it is not my real name anyways) how smart am I :p (say "very") Love you back!

I was tagged by the magnificent Patrick! Thank you sir, you are very kind. I'm suppose to answer these 8 questions and make up new questions and tag others. Let's give it a try.

1.You can have one super power, what would it be?
Losing the weight and staying in perfect shape. Would that count as a super power? May be not. So let's think. I certainly don't wanna hear people's thought. Too scary and probably depressing for me. I'd also be very paranoid about anyone else reading my own. Do you think flying would burn a lot of calories?? That could be nice.
But honestly I would like to have the power of healing. Myself and others. Both physical and mental healing.

2.Which do you see as more important, diet or exercise?
I would say exercise. May be because overall that is the thing I need to work on most and keep at it. Diet by itself can't shape your body, build strength and don't forget endorphins!

3. If we're forced to become vegetarians by law could you do so or would you frequent the black market for meat?
No way! Don't even think about it. That would be a nightmare coming true for me! I'd sell my soul to the black market just to get a piece of turkey even! I'm a fast oxidiser and without a proper portion of protein I do not function and I need my meat to support that throughout the day.

4. Do you consider the word 'Obese' to be a proper word to define those extremely over-weight, or do you consider it to be improper if not a hateful word?
I don't mind the word obese or fat or whatever. Probably because I don't let people to use it in the "wrong" way. But I'm an intimidating woman so I know other people who have a problem with others using these words. I simply use them to state facts.

5. Do you believe that Elvis died on August 16, 1977 or was his death a conspiracy cover up?
Sorry to disappoint anyone but right this second Elvis is watching a game show in my living room. As soon as I'm done here I'll join him and may be he'll sing Heartbreak Hotel for me before bedtime. (Dare to dream people)

6. How much water do you drink a day and do you agree that water intake of 8 glasses a day or more is critical to a healthy body?
I agree cos I have seen what the lack of enough water in your body can do to you. A friend of mine used to forget to drink water cos she hated it. She fainted frequently and many other problems followed..
I drink about 12 glasses. This is an average. I drink more during summer and even more if I workout. I don't drink it to lose weight or be healthy. I drink because I get thirsty. It's been the same all my life. I'm just lucky about water.

7. Aliens have invaded earth and landed a mile from your house, do you run for the hills, do you grab a weapon & charge, or do you try and communicate with them?
First I try to find a vantage point for me and my family. Then I observe if they are hostile or not. If they are hostile I run for my life. If not I try to communicate. Of course they may hide their agenda. So I'll always be looking the exit signs. Then again does anyone has a chance if aliens invaded earth. Thank God I live in Istanbul. Aliens always invade USA :)

8. Is your current approach to getting healthy an approach you consider to be fun and can you do it for the rest of your life?
I want to do it for the rest of my life. That's why I take it a week at a time. I don't follow someone else's diet. I'm trying to learn more and try new things, get them in my favorites list somehow. It's a process and it will not end at any given point of my life.

You've been tagged:
Stefi
baygirl32
Jessica
Tammy
Whitney
Putz
Luke
Kimbo (and here)

Your questions:
1. Who is your hero? Why?
2. Do you have a garden where your grow your veggies? If not do you try to buy organic or do you find it costs way too much?
3. Do you use exercise videos? What's your favorite, why?
4. Favorite workout music?
5. How do you measure your progress? If you haven't reached your goal yet, do you own any skinny clothes you keep to remind you of your goals?
6. Do you have any secrets to keep your energy up for the workouts or your day in general?
7. I like Patrick's super power question so what would your super power be if you could have one?
8. If you had the opportunity to move to anywhere in the world, where would it be?

Blueberry Love

Blueberries have been on sale (blame the economy) for a while at our market. I'm so in love with blueberries. My favorite berries I might add. So sweet and perfect to compliment anything you might wanna place them next to. They make me happy. I'm telling you all this because Patrick asked me "What is it that you want to do or get into that will make you happy that you can realistically do today, tomorrow, or as far as a week out?" Obviously blueberries are not enough to "change my life" but little things always add up, right?

Well... more than fruit I need a couple of other things. I need a job! I'm so annoyed and frustrated about the one job I really wanted. Will it ever happen? It's not up to me but I've been waiting for a long time. So it is way past time I start looking for something else. I don't even wanna think about this subject but I'm really tired of waiting here. Time to move on. If that job still happens I'll be on board happily ever after.

My boyfriend has been hiding in his shell. Probably since he's been back from his service. It's not like anything bad happened while he was there. He's always been a quiet guy. Doesn't talk much about his problems or his inner whatever. But since he's been back it seems he doesn't ever talk. It's like he's lost his ability to have a conversation sometimes. He doesn't even wanna see his friends. Don't get me wrong. He does have reasons like he is always tired working 12 hours then gym everyday... He has been stressing about his work conditions not improving like he is not paid what he deserves at all and the hours are so long, etc. He stopped caring for anything else almost. I need to break his shell once again and get him to enjoy things a little. That would make me happy.

I've talked to J a few times since last week. She is doing great and I'm feeling a lot better about her being away :)  She is hoping to be back early august if there isn't any news.

People we have a serious problem!!!! The 7th Harry Potter movie is almost out and next year we'll see the last movie!! Then it will be over!!! No more Happy Potter!!!!! No amount of vampire hotness can match the magic Harry provides... I'll be heartbroken my friends... But it is worth this love. My heart will go on and on...


Love yourself
♥River

Beautiful Blogger Award

The rules: pass the award on to 7 bloggers and write 7 things about myself that you did not know!

Thank you Aylilth!!! Such a great encouragement!! =D I'm honored ♥
I'm trying not to cheat on this one. 7 things you don't know is though. Why am I finding this one so hard :) Let's just try.

1 - I'm Muslim

2 - I'm bi

3 - I have two tattoos

4 - I studied in California (Pitzer College) for two years then quit because I got very very depressed (I spent a lot of time with a shrink) possibly because I missed home but certainly not the only reason

5 - I'm not a friendly person (do not argue I know what I'm talking about)

6 - I used to be very skinny when I was a kid. So my parents took me to a million doctors and I started using medicine to up my apetite when I was 8 years old. You have seen the results that first piece of chain of things did.
7 - My biggest fantasy in life is to live in a country style house close to a cliff and a forest 10 minutes away from a little town and at most 2 hours away from a big city spending my days writing, taking after my millions of cats and dogs and all the rest, visiting my kids, and loving my husband.


Now time to pass this Beautiful Blogger Award on to 7 bloggers. I kinda want to name different people from my last award. If you haven't received it yet and would so kindly except it:

CJ
Jessica
Police Girl
SherRon
BAYGIRL32
Barlow Putz
Renée


xoxo -River

My Second Award

So I got an email from Renée and she is giving me an award. I'm so honored to be even considered for it. So excited!! YAY =)

We have some rules obviously (see below). I am freaking excited so #1 is done. The second one is tricky. If I stayed 100% anonymous I'm guessing I would have picked option (b) in a heart beat. (a) sounds dangerous beyond all others. I tend to talk way too much and say a million times more than I should when I drink. So I did a vlog! (I hope the link is working or I'll fix it asap)

I'm suppose to pass this award onto 3 or more people. Unless they already received it, here is who I think should this award should also go to:

Kimbo
Erin
Ms. Chunky Chick
Patrick 
Cassandra
Al

(most of you don't have emails listed so I hope you'll read this if I can't find a way to contact you)
 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
 Rules:
1. Get really excited that you got the coolest award EVER!
2. Choose ONE of the following options of accepting the OMB award:(a) Get really drunk and blog for 15 minutes straight, or for as long as you can focus.
(b) Write about your most embarrassing moment.
(c) Write a “Soundtrack of your childhood” post.
(d) Make your next blog a ‘vlog’/video blog. Basically, you’re talking to the camera about whatever.
(e) Take a picture of yourself first thing in the morning, before you do anything else (hair, makeup, etc) and post it.
3. Pass this award onto at least 3, but preferably more, awesome bloggers as yourself. Don’t forget to tell them.

GUILTY

 So I've been tagged by Path to Wellness and I might add I have more "innocents" than her! Huh!

The rules of the game:
RULE 1- You can only say Guilty or Innocent.
RULE 2- You are not allowed to explain anything unless someone messages you and asks!
RULE 3- Copy and paste this into your notes, delete my answers, type in your answers and tag to your friends to answer this.

The Questions:

1. Asked someone to marry you? GUILTY
2. Ever kissed someone of the same sex? GUILTY x billions
3. Danced on a table in a bar? INNOCENT
4. Ever told a lie? GUILTY
5. Had feelings for someone whose feelings you can’t have back? GUILTY
6. Kissed a picture? GUILTY
7. Slept in until 5 PM? GUILTY
8. Fallen asleep at work/school? GUILTY
9. Held a snake? INNOCENT
10. Been suspended from school? INNOCENT
11. Worked at a fast food restaurant? INNOCENT
12. Stolen from a store? GUILTY
13. Been fired from a job? INNOCENT
14. Done something you regret? GUILTY (duh!)
15. Laughed until something you were drinking came out your nose? GUILTY
16. Caught a snowflake on your tongue? GUILTY
17. Kissed in the rain? GUILTY
18. Sat on a roof top? GUILTY
19. Kissed someone you shouldn't? GUILTY
20. Sang in the shower? INNOCENT
21. Been pushed into a pool with all your clothes on? GUILTY
22. Shaved your head? INNOCENT
23. Had a boxing membership? INNOCENT
24. Made a boyfriend/Girlfriend cry? GUILTY
25. Been in a band? INNOCENT
26. Shot a gun? INNOCENT
27. Donated Blood? INNOCENT
28. Eaten alligator meat? INNOCENT
29. Eaten cheesecake? GUILTY
30. Still love someone you shouldn’t? GUILTY
31. Have/had a tattoo? GUILTY
32. Liked someone, but will never tell who? INNOCENT
33. Been too honest? GUILTY
34. Ruined a surprise? GUILTY
35. Ate in a restaurant and got so bloated that you couldn’t walk afterward? GUILTY GUILTY GUILTY
36. Erased someone in your friends list? GUILTY
37. Dressed in a woman’s clothes (if you’re a guy) or man’s clothes (if you’re a girl)? INNOCENT
38. Joined a pageant? INNOCENT
39. Been told that you’re handsome or beautiful by someone who really meant what they said? GUILTY
40. Had communication with your ex? GUILTY
41.Got totally drunk on the night before exam? INNOCENT
42. Got so angry that you cried? GUILTY

So I'm supposed to tag people. Tricky very tricky! So (if you haven't done this already) I will tag Stefi and CJ